Shapley

Anyone who has been out on the traditional dating scene knows all too well the perils that can arise when you start asking strangers in a pub whether they’ve got a boyfriend. Even if you don’t get beaten up by a burly guy you somehow managed to miss earlier you run the risk of an embarrassingly public knock back.

No wonder then that online dating sites such as Dating Direct are proving to be massively popular.

The principle is very simple. In common with other social media sites such as Facebook, you create a profile with basic biographical details – age, location, interests and so on. Then, both sexes alike can search these public profiles to find a suitable match and initiate contact in the hope of getting a real date and potentially an ongoing relationship.

So far, so simple. But of course the technology only takes you so far. At some point you will find yourself talking to a girl in one form or another. And whether that’s through instant messaging or internal emails on a site like Dating Direct there are a few things you should remember when talking to a girl.

1. Firstly and most importantly: be yourself. While an online persona is easy to embellish, your date won’t thank you if she finds out later down the line that you’ve effectively been lying.
2. Secondly, remember that if a girl is using an online dating site, she is prone to exactly the same kinds of insecurities and doubts that probably plague you. So showing off or coming across as super-confident can be offputting. Not many people are that keen on someone who is “cocky”.
3. Thirdly, don’t just judge on appearances. As you flick through photographs it’s easy to get suckered in by the ones you think are the prettiest. That’s fine, but allow yourself a little honesty. Would you really like to be judged on your looks? Are you really that good looking. Chances are you are, like most people, just average in the looks department. So don’t be so harsh when looking at potential dates. Far more important that you can trust, laugh and share with this other person instead of just being able to enjoy their physical appearance.
4. Finally, remember that this is supposed to be fun. It’s easy for people to feel desperate because they haven’t found their perfect mate. The point is that you don’t actually have to. There are lots of different kinds of relationship and the more things you’re willing to try, the more chance you have of enjoying both your own company and that of a girl.

Photo by msaluste.